"I Just wanted to me a mum" Leanne shares her journey towards solo parenthood through IVF

With no partner on the horizon and her biological clock ticking louder than ever, she decided to quit waiting for ‘the one’ and chose to pursue solo parenthood instead.

Now welcoming her baby daughter Penny into the world, who she calls her “lucky Penny”, the 32-year-old maxillofacial dental nurse is speaking out about her journey to parenthood and how becoming a mum was the best decision she’s ever made.

Leanne, from Waterlooville, always imagined motherhood in her future, but as her 30th birthday came and went, she began worrying about her fertility and what delaying motherhood might mean.

“I’ve always wanted to be a mum but never met someone I could see myself settling down with,” she explained. “I was approaching 31 and knew that if I waited any longer to meet someone, then I’d likely be 35-36 by the time I was trying for a baby.”

She started researching egg freezing to keep her options open, but Leanne stumbled across the idea of solo parenthood. The more she looked into it, the more it felt like the right path.

“It meant that parenthood would be on my terms,” she said. “I realised there are people who end up doing it alone anyway, I just chose to start that way.”

Initially, Leanne considered IUI (intrauterine insemination) and reached out to a mutual friend who had also taken the solo route to parenthood.

“She said she’d also looked into IUI but had decided on IVF instead, as the success rates were much higher,” says Leanne. That conversation helped tip the balance. “Once I’d made the decision, I felt a huge sense of relief. I didn’t need to wait anymore.”

This decision swayed Leanne, who began researching clinics and booked her first appointment. After an underwhelming consultation at one clinic, she quickly found her footing after visiting TFP Wessex Fertility.

“It was a completely different experience. I went in with a list of questions and the specialist answered every single one of them as she was taking me through my options. She also had printouts that helped me visualise how the treatment worked and reassured me that if it didn’t work the first time round, then there were other things we could try.”

With her fertility results looking strong, Leanne was ready to begin her IVF treatment straight away. But first, she had to select a sperm donor. After taking a blood test for cytomegalovirus (CMV), one of the most common viral infections which impacts an estimated half of UK adults, Leanne’s negative result meant she was advised to choose a CMV negative donor to reduce the risk of infection during pregnancy. But this dramatically narrowed her options.

“Ideally, I had wanted someone with brown hair and blue eyes, but all the donors who matched those criteria had tested positive for CMV. Looking back now, it was narrow-minded of me, but I felt that I was spending a lot of money and wanted my child to look like me too.”

“I was starting to feel despondent, but my friend pointed out that if I had met someone organically, I wouldn’t have refused to have a baby with them because they had brown eyes.”

Encouraged to keep an open mind, Leanne eventually found a donor profile that felt right. “Reading his profile, I felt emotional. He was married with three children and sounded like a really kind person. It was nice to know that if Penny wants to learn more about him when she’s older, then he is open to it.”

In August 2023, Leanne started her treatment with a short course of hormone medication to stimulate her egg growth. With her mum by her side to help administer the injections, the process felt manageable and Leanne experienced minimal side effects.

During egg collection, 24 eggs were retrieved and 18 were successfully fertilised using ICSI (intracytoplasmic sperm injection). By day six, Leanne had five healthy embryos frozen. She gave her body a short break before returning for a frozen embryo transfer in October 2023. One Grade A embryo was thawed and transferred, and just two weeks later a positive pregnancy test confirmed the treatment had worked.

To Leanne’s delight, Penny was born in July 2024. Almost a year later, Leanne is soaking up every second of solo motherhood – a role she says feels completely natural and the most empowering decision of her life.

“I couldn’t have done this without the support of my family and friends, but it is the most natural thing in the world. I had a brief moment where I worried about what people would say and then realised that if someone can’t accept my decision they don’t deserve to be in mine or my daughter’s life.

“These days, it feels more common for a child to not have a traditional family of a mum and a dad. When she starts school, I’m sure she’ll have friends that have two mums and no dad or two dads and that’s perfectly normal. I’ll always be honest with Penny and make sure that she knows she’s loved no matter what.”

While she still has four embryos frozen and hasn’t ruled out a sibling in the future, Leanne says she’s focused on enjoying every moment with Penny.

“Never say never but right now Penny is enough for me. Everything was so perfect the first time that I almost don’t want to tempt fate and risk a heartbreak a second time around.”

For more information on Leanne’s story, visit: https://tfp-fertility.com/en-gb/our-success-stories/solo-parenthood-is-the-most-natural-thing-in-the-world